It seems like every time I turn around, someone is announcing they're pregnant. I'm happy for them. . .really. But at the same time, I'm enraged, because I won't be getting pregnant. I won't be having any more kids. And it wasn't even my choice.
I found out by accident that radiation had killed my ovaries. A quick off-hand comment by some doctor that I never saw again and I'm sitting stunned in the office.
I never meant for my daughter to be an only child.
And I'm pissed that she has to be.
I knew there was going to come a time when pregnant people and newborns were gonna send me down the spiral, but I always thought it would start with my boss' daughter (the first baby I saw post-op). It didn't, so I thought I was safe.
Boy was I wrong.
All the feelings were just waiting for 5 months to pass and me to drop my guard.
Oh well, I'll just wall myself off while I work on it. I mean, I can't be so self-centered as to ask my friends not to talk about their pregnancies, can I?
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